Fat gay men kissing tongues
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I don’t need to make sense of others’ demands of me. Nor must I quietly design my orders at restaurants to avoid stares and comments from friends and strangers. I don’t have to become a “perfect” fat person, designed to meet everyone’s needs but my own. We’re expected to “be confident,” but if we show that confidence publicly, we’re upbraided for “glorifying obesity.” If we don’t like the anti-fat bias we face, we’re told to “just have weight loss surgery,” a tossed-off mandate that can cost tens of thousands of dollars out of pocket, includes months or years of follow-up procedures, and forever alters the functioning of our bodies and the foods we can eat.īut in recent years, I’ve come to realize that the responsibility to reconcile those conflicting expectations isn’t mine. We are told not to care what other people think but are expected to heed our experiences of anti-fat bias as “wake-up calls” to motivate us to lose weight.
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And we contend with other people’s belief that we’re not only less healthy than thin people, but that we’re also morally inferior.Īmong all of those institutional and systemic barriers, fat people also contend with meeting the many strongly held and often conflicting expectations of those around us. We reliably pay more money for basic necessities ( sometimes referred to as “the fat tax”) while simultaneously making less money than our thin counterparts. We may struggle to find health care that isn’t shaped by our providers’ biases or exclusionary policies. Pervasive anti-fat bias means that fat people can face challenges in meeting even our most basic needs. Being a fat person in a society built for thin people can be exhausting.